Crushed. Bubble.

A new blog and a change of text, so here it is, saturday night. I'm sat on an uncomfy sofa wrapped in a blanket (not because I'm cold but it saves me putting on a pair of pants)And I have blown it. I found what I saw as perfection and then realised it was a hope of a dream. Someone who got me. My dress sense, my ecclectic musical taste, my dry and sometimes dark sense of humour. Whoa slow down Garry! I'm not telling the full story here, and that is at least what you deserve to hear. So lets start anew.

Hi, how are you? Good me too! So the pleasantries are now out the way. I have been pining for someone for about a year. I like being single but I would love to have someone to share my life with that I don't have to pay(not prostitutes I am referring to my shrink). So after a couple of months I became enticed by someone. Ok thats not fair to you either, hows about a special someone, yeah thats better. A special someone, with brown hair and a cute laugh. Thats all I got from first impressions, yeah really blokey aren't I?(For any blokes out there imagine someone with huges boobs and then you might carry on actually reading) So ten months, sounds like a long time really doesn't it. Its not. ten months and she had wriggled her way into my bubble.Please refer to a previous post if you don't know what I mean by this. I could be miserable and then think of her and instantly smile, thats quite a feat when you consider how indifferent I am. I thought about her when I was glum, she featured in my daydreams. But now I have got her in trouble and I actually feel guilty, thats huge for me. The worst part is she considers us friends. Not normally a bad thing but I cannae do it. Everytime I see her I think what could be and now it won't. This is why I have my bubble, it protects me from all this, and the first time anyone has managed to be included in it and I get crushed. Guess instead of having a bubble I should just block out everything. Switch off and ignore.