Two things...

if you know me at all then you'll know that there are two things I do to people, one is study them the other is to force them away when I feel that I'm falling for them. I'll be honest with you there is a lass at work, well I say a lass but what I actually mean is a stunningly attractive woman. (Lass makes me think of someone young.) Well I have been getting closer and closer with her, not on a physical basis but mentally and friendship-wise. I was let in on a pretty major secret before most of the ladies that she's close with and I was trying to be there in whatever way I could, monetary mostly but I was there as a friend.
Thats when it started to get strange, the more time I spent away from her the more I thought about her even to the point where she was featuring in my dreams, not in a pervy way, but in a cute cuddly way. I even spoke her name in my sleep which was to the dismay of the woman in my bed, to the point where she punched me in the nuts and shredded my tophat. That was the end of another short-term relationship!
Now I find myself not being able to get her out of my mind at all (the person from work not the one that shredded my hat) I have begun thinking more and more about her, but she seems to be trying to get back with her ex and me being the coward that I am haven't told her how I feel not even hinted at the idea. Now to stop my heart from hurting so much I am being ignorant and a twat to her just so I can feel that there is no chance of anything happenning between the two of us, I know its a shitty thing to do but hey if I don't stop my heart hurting then I'll go insane or more insane then I am already.
So if that person has actually read this I hope you understand why I am doing what I'm doing but if it helps ease any kind of pain I have caused just know that you mean more to me then anyone else has done in the past few years.
On my knees hoping you'll understand.
Sorry!